Here is the long and awaited chapter i owe you guys since like august. sorry for the wait. Hope you guys like it. leave me reviews/comments
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Chapter [[11]]
What if Nick didn’t like the fact that I was happy with his brother? What if he thought I was only with his brother to annoy him? Or anger him?
All through the night, those were the questions that haunted me. I was in no way with Joe to annoy him. I was with Joe because when I was with Joe, everything felt like I did at one point with nick. I feel like nothing can hurt me when I’m with Joe. He makes me smile, he and I just get along. Everything seems so easy. I’m being laid back, and just for having fun with Joe. I fell like my old self being with him.
It was 7:30am, and I was already up. Showered, already had food in my system. I had nothing to do with myself for the next couple hours since I knew Joe would not be up. We didn’t really set a time for us to tell Nick.
I figured that it was time to get out my sketch book and draw some dress designs that had been in my head for a while now. No better way to get my mind of things than to draw, and focus on other things.
Sketch, after sketch. Water break. Bathroom break. This is what the next 3 hours where like. Not that I minded. My mind got to get a few good sketch, that will go towards my line I plan on presenting in an upcoming meeting.
The phone interrupted my current sketch. I picked it up from the counter and took a look at the ID and thought twice about answering it.
“Jake, what do you want? Stop calling me already.” I said.
“No, not until you give me a second chance. Bella, I miss you. I need you. I’m sorry.”
“No, you are just sorry you got caught.”
“That is not true. You were the shining light for me.”
“I used to think that too, but seeing your lips on hers, broke me.”
“I’m downstairs, please let me come up. Let me explain.” He pleaded. I’m not sure what took over me. It was either that I need closure or that Jake just sounded so sad that I called down to main desk to allow him access.
“Bells?”
“Don’t call me that.”
“But you are still my Bells.”
“No I’m not. Now what do you want?”
“I want you back.” He said walking towards me. I was currently sitting on the floor. My sketches around me.
“Jake, don’t get closer. I don’t want you any closer. I don’t care that you want me back. I was yours. I would of done anything for you. You let me go.”
“I never wanted to let you go.”
“Well you did, and now I want you out of my life.” I said getting up.
“Bells, please. I never meant to hurt you. Believe me when I say that.” Jake told me, looking down at his shoes.
“I gave you everything. I loved you. You broke my heart. You knew how much I need you. You knew how much you meant to me. I guess I didn’t mean that much to you since you found what you needed in someone else’s arms.” I was now on the verge of tears. Little did I know that Joe was standing right outside the door.
“Bells…Please. Just give me--”
“Don’t call me that!” I screamed.
“Fine, don’t tell me that those nights you and I spent meant nothing to you. If you can tell me that than I will stop calling, and bothering you. I’ll say goodbye, and leave.”
“They meant everything to me. Meant as in the past tense.” I had tears falling down my cheek.
“Don’t do this to me.”
“You did this to me. So please leave.” I said walking towards the door. He reached for my hand as I walked passed him. “Let go of me.”
“Why?”
“Cause I don’t want you near me anymore.” I said struggling to get my hand away from his.
“Or because you won’t be able to resist.”
“Not even close. Now go.”
“Fine. You weren’t even that good in bed.”
“Oh, yeah. That’s why you are over here begging for me to take you back.”
“Whatever.” He said as he opened the door. I went to close the door, and there stood Jake and Joe standing face to face giving each other dirty looks.
“Goodbye Jake.” I said as I attempted to get rid of Jake. I didn’t want to explain to Joe anything about Jake. How long had Joe been there?
Jake left without even turning around. Joe walked into my place without saying anything. I have a feeling that I’m going to have to explain myself to Joe.
“How long had you been there?”
“For a few minutes.”
“So you heard?”
“Yeah.” Joe said awkwardly sitting on the couch.
“There is nothing going on with me and him.”
“Yeah, I know that much.”
“Okay. I just wanted to clear the air of that question.”
“Got it.” Joe said sitting a good 12 inches away from me. I didn’t say anything back for a few minutes. Neither did Joe. All you could hear in the room was our slow breathing. Nothing else. Joe was staring straight ahead. I in the other hand was looking at him.
“Are you going to ask or not?” I said, growing tired of the silence.
“About what? How you have guys begging you take them back? Or about what happened with you and that guy.” Joe bitterly said.
“Hey, don’t use that tone with me. I had a life before you showed up.”
“I know. I’m sorry.” Joe said taking my hand in his. I scooted closer to him. Not too close, still leaving a few inches between us. “It’s just the thought about some other guy being in your bed. You said those memories meant everything to you.”
“We don’t have to talk about that.” I quietly said. Almost in a whisper.
“You’re not a virgin are you?”
“No.” I said looking down at his hand. He still wore that purity ring he wore since before he left for tour all those years back. “You are still right?”
“No.” He said. My eyes shot up to his face.
“What?! Then why do you still wear this ring?” I said as I picked up his hand and shined the ring in his face.
“The ring was never for not having sex before marriage. This ring represents that I will treat ladies with respect. That I won’t treat them in a bad way.”
I was speechless.
“So, when did you lose your virginity?” He said attempting to break the silence that now surrounded us.
“I was 17. You?”
“18.” Joe said.
That was as far as that conversation was going to go. Neither Joe nor I wanted to know every detail losing each others virginity. It was that conversation that most couples have at one point. I continued to finish the sketch I was on before anyone had shown up.
“You look really cute when you draw.” Joe said. He had tried to read a book, tried to find something on TV. Attempted to listen to music, but things didn’t seemed to hold his attention for too long.
“Hey, are you trying to distract me again?”
“Is it working?” Joe asked. Sounding like a 3 year old boy in the process.
“Not one bit.”
“It was worth a try, but um…I know you are really into your sketch and everything, but when are we going to tell Nick?” Joe asked me. I looked up at him. Once we told Nick, things would either become better…or they would crash and burn.
“I don’t know.” I said still looking at him. My eyes felt like they were about to crash with tears. I hated the thought of hurting Nick. Even if he didn’t have feelings for me, me dating his brother was something he never expected. This could even hurt the band. I hadn’t even thought about that. What if this caused them to fight…and the Jonas Brothers broke up. That would be like a ton of bricks weighing me down.
“Hey, don’t cry. It’s going to be okay. Everything will be okay.” Joe said as he wrapped his arm around me. I hadn’t even noticed that the tears were slowly cascading down my cheeks.
“How do you know?”
“I don’t, but what I feel for you is strong enough to give me courage to tell Nick. I’m sure Nick will feel weird about it, but Nick isn’t a cold hearted person. I’m sure he hopes that you will be happy.” He said as he ran his fingers through my hair.
“And you do make me happy.”
“Come on. We can do this.” He said as he started to get up.
“Okay.” I said. Still not sure of the outcome.
Once Joe and I arrived at the hotel they were currently staying at, we rode the elevator up. Joe seemed to be nervous by the way he could barely stay still. I was the same way. I was cracking my fingers, something I only do when I’m scared.
The elevator got the their floor and the doors slid open revealing an empty hallway.
“Hey, before we go in there. I want you to know that whatever happens… we will still be together. Just you and me. Okay?”
“Us against the world.” I said as I placed a small kiss on his lips.
We parted apart and I immediately felt the walls closing in on us. I saw Nick sitting on the couch watching ESPN.
“Hey Nick.” Joe said as calmly as he could. I could sense that he wasn’t calm, because when he said Nicks name his voice cracked. Something I hadn’t heard since we has 15.
“Hey Joe, and Bella.” Nick said as he turned the TV off and glanced at us. A small smile playing on his lips. His smile that he rarely shares with the world.
“Where’s Kevin?” Joe asked.
“Um, he said something about showing Frankie the city. Big Rob is with them. Mom and Dad called earlier saying that they are back in Jersey already.” Nick filled us in.
“Oh that’s good.” Joe replied. Joe turned to me and his said it all. He was scared. He didn’t want to hurt Nick. Joe sensed that this was going to crush Nick. No matter how much I hated Nick at one point, I could never forget those moments when Nick made me the happiest I could ever wish. When he and I would just sit and talk about where we saw out future. Joe and Nick were brothers. They were band mates, best friends. This was going to pull them apart. I couldn’t do this. How could I have been so selfish and just think of me.
“Bella, are you okay?” Nick asked me. I was about to reply when I felt Joe catch me as I fell to the ground.
