this sounds really awesome!! i just gots one tip. when someone else speaks, put a break in the line. like this:
I was sitting on my porch outside of my house. My friend Brenna was sitting next to me. We were looking at a Jonas Brothers magazine. We LOVE the Jonas Brother. I like Joe and she likes Nick. I looked up and then I saw a big moving truck. I saw three familiar boys. It was the Jonas Brothers!!!!!!
"Brenna!" I said, taping on Brenna's shoulder.
"Oh my goodness it's the Jonas Brothers!" Brenna squealed.
"Come on!" I said. "Let's go say hi to them!" We ran over to the Jonas house.
"Hi," I said.
"Hi," Joe said.
"I'm Jenna. I live next door," I said, taking Joe's hand.
"Cool. I'm Joe Jonas," Joe said.
"I know who you guys are. We love your music," I said.
"I'm Brenna," Brenna said.
"I'm Nick and this is Kevin," Nick said.
"Do you guys want to hang out after we're done packing?" Kevin asked.
"Sure!" I said.
"Cool. See ya later," Joe said, as he walked away and winked at me.
I waved at him and turned to Brenna. We both smiled at each other and started jumping up and down and squealing. We ran back to my house and waited for the Jonas Brothers.
now, how is that. i think it makes your already awesome story flow even better. haha. well i cant wait til the next chappy. ily! xoxo!
KaYbUgGiE
and if you need a girlie for Kevin, ill be there. haha. ily! xoxo!
