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New Post 8/1/2008 9:42 PM
User is offline emily [Go Penguins! ♥]
2160 posts
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Re: Forever, a new fanfic  

that's really good so far! :D

post more soon! :)


Photobucket
 
New Post 8/1/2008 9:42 PM
User is offline Perriwinkle
702 posts
10th Level Poster




Re: Forever, a new fanfic  

bump

update within the next hour or so =] im typing it as i speak =]


Forever, joe fanfic
 
New Post 8/1/2008 9:43 PM
User is offline emmy-kins
1147 posts
skilletcrazed.deviantart.com
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Re: Forever, a new fanfic  

this is awesome! I loved it

post more soon please

<3 emily


Jonas lovin' 7/5/07 12/27/07 3/22/08 8/11/08 8/16/08 <3 Photobucket
thank you, ninja.jonas!
 
New Post 8/1/2008 10:00 PM
User is offline kitkat
315 posts
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Re: Forever, a new fanfic  

BUMP!





^^^The reason I smile everyday, even when it hurts<3

~*my fanfics~*
~*~one day at a time~*~
~*~hello beautiful~*~one shot
 
New Post 8/1/2008 10:26 PM
User is offline morgan [will hold on]
349 posts
www.myspace.com/radio__static
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Re: Forever, a new fanfic  
I enjoyed it. :]
My only critiques are that you repeated the sentence "I guess what they say about summer camp relationships are true." twice[one after the other, and it isn't that big of a deal], and you should put in more descriptions to slightly out-weigh the talking.


just take a breath
 
New Post 8/1/2008 10:29 PM
User is offline Perriwinkle
702 posts
10th Level Poster




Re: Forever, a new fanfic chapter 2 up 
Modified By Perriwinkle  on 8/1/2008 8:29:36 PM)

I wasn’t at all surprised that at by the time we were at our last hole, Nick was in first. After all, who hadn’t heard about his and Joe’s secret golf society? Nick went first. It went super close, around 30 feet from the green. We all clapped. Joe was next. He hit it very well, just not quite as far as Nick. Then Sarah. Hers went right next to Nicks.

“Nice one Sarah.” Nick smiled.

My turn. I positioned myself and looked down. “Here I go” I thought.

I hit. It went around 10 feet away from Joe’s. “Oh well.” I sighed.

“That was pretty good,” Joe said trying to make me feel better. “just try holding your club like this.” he said holding my hands and positioning them on my club. I was blushing, I could feel the scarlet heat on my face. Then we hopped into our carts and drove towards our balls. I hit mine, this time holding it just like Joe had taught me. It went right to the green, like half a foot from the flag!

“Woah, impressive. You learn fast.” Joe smiled

“Yeah, uhm, thanks” I replied.

They all hit their balls. Nicks went in the hole. Sarah’s went near mine, and Joe’s went right on the edge of the hole, hovered for a second, and stopped.

“AH man!” Joe yelled. “Nick, you must of somehow used your amazing James Bond skills to make it so my ball wouldn’t go in, so you could win.”

We all cracked up.

“Well you know Joe, if I did, I wouldn’t tell you, would I?” Nick played along, smiling at Sarah. She smiled back.

“Or would you Nick, I don’t know…perhaps you want to confuse me, and make me think that you didn’t when you actually did…”

“That’s quite a complex theory Joe…I think you may have something there…” I laughed

Joe jogged over to his ball and positioned his putter, “If this doesn’t go in Nick, then I know.”

He tapped the ball in. “Your off the hook, for now.”

Sarah then proceeded to hit hers in, and then it was my turn. I tapped it to lightly. I hit it again and it went in.

“So..who came in second?” Sarah asked.

“Actually,” Nick replied looking at the score card “you did Sarah, then Joe, and then Chelsea.”

Suddenly Joe’s iphone started going off.

“Hey Kevin. Starbucks now? Uh sure, is it ok to take some friends? Kay, cool. Bye. Hey, that was Kevin. Do you guys wanna go to star bucks with us?”

“Sure! I lovee star bucks!” Sarah said..

It was true. Starbucks is her addiction.

“Great! Lets go!” Nick exclaimed

And we were off.

 

kay guys i have 2 go to the Breaking Dawn release real quick so im srry its short. Leave me lots of comments!

ily all

♥♪♥Chelsea♥♪♥

 

Chapter 2


Forever, joe fanfic
 
New Post 8/1/2008 10:32 PM
User is offline Perriwinkle
702 posts
10th Level Poster




Re: Forever, a new fanfic chapter2 up 
Modified By Perriwinkle  on 8/1/2008 8:46:34 PM)

 morgan [will hold on] wrote
I enjoyed it. :]
My only critiques are that you repeated the sentence "I guess what they say about summer camp relationships are true." twice[one after the other, and it isn't that big of a deal], and you should put in more descriptions to slightly out-weigh the talking.

o thanks =] i didnt mean to write it twice. It messed up b/c i copy and paste it from microsoft word so sometimes it messes up. and im going to try to write more descriptions..i just feel at the moment, during introductions, there should be this amount of dialog...but once everyone gets back home i plan to have less dialog =]

thnk you for the advice =]


Forever, joe fanfic
 
New Post 8/1/2008 10:47 PM
User is offline Perriwinkle
702 posts
10th Level Poster




Re: Forever, a new fanfic chapter2 up 

BUMP

I POSTEDD


Forever, joe fanfic
 
New Post 8/1/2008 10:50 PM
User is offline Laura+Nick=♥
252 posts
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Re: Forever, a new fanfic chapter2 up 

http://jonasbrothersfan.com/Community/Forum/tabid/265/forumid/62/threadid/653054/scope/posts/threadpage/1/Default.aspx

read my story called "Last Night's Alive + Tonight You Die"


Photobucket
 
New Post 8/1/2008 11:23 PM
User is offline morgan [will hold on]
349 posts
www.myspace.com/radio__static
No Ranking




Re: Forever, a new fanfic  
 Perriwinkle wrote

morgan [will hold on] wrote
I enjoyed it. :]
My only critiques are that you repeated the sentence "I guess what they say about summer camp relationships are true." twice[one after the other, and it isn't that big of a deal], and you should put in more descriptions to slightly out-weigh the talking.

o thanks =] i didnt mean to write it twice. It messed up b/c i copy and paste it from microsoft word so sometimes it messes up. and im going to try to write more descriptions..i just feel at the moment, during introductions, there should be this amount of dialog...but once everyone gets back home i plan to have less dialog =]

thnk you for the advice =]


Okie doke. And no problem. :]


just take a breath
 
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