Okay guys before I post this I want you to know that I do not feel that the boys have changed at all and that this is just a story okay? Also it was the song that inspired me to write it not how I felt about them so please don't yell me telling me that they haven't changed, I know they haven't. So enjoy it please.
Wyckoff
And when we get home, I know we won't be home at all
This place we live, it is not where we belong
And I miss who we were in the town that we could call our own
Going back to get away after everything has changed
I stared out the darkly tinted window as the tour bus drove down a familiar road one my family and I hadn’t traveled on for years. Turning my head from the window I stared at my brothers; Kevin was so engrossed in his texting that he didn’t even yell at me when I threw a paper ball at his face, Nick was fast asleep on his bunk after staying up all last night trying to write a new song and Frankie was just so excited to be home. But it wasn’t home anymore no, it was just another place we visited now we didn’t belong anymore. We weren’t who we were years ago in this town that we called our own.
We had been touring for so many years we had to get away from it all; to finally relax and not worry about performing night after night or do early morning radio shows. I felt like I should be happy that we were going home but I was already missing seeing my L.A. friends and the expensive stores my brothers and I shopped at but maybe this was for the best maybe we needed an eye opener to see how far we have come and be grateful for everything we have now.
Could you remind me of a time when we were so alive
(Everything has changed)
Do you remember that? Do you remember that?
(Everything has changed)
Could you help me push aside all that I have left behind?
(Everything has changed)
Do you remember that? Do you remember that?
Closing my eyes all the memories of being in our home town came back to me the time when we all felt alive and not some robot that Hollywood controlled making us do things against our will saying it would make our fans happy, but what about us? Were we happy anymore? I don’t even remember what being happy felt like anymore. I sighed heavily rubbing my temples as I thought about when I was younger and when I knew what being happy felt like.
I was 11 and I was chasing my younger brother Nick around the yard spraying him with a water gun our mom had just bought for me for my birthday. It was a beautiful day outside; the sun shining brightly over us and not a single cloud in the sky. My mother was standing on the wooden porch watching us play; her small hand stoking her large baby bump; she was due in a month or two but then suddenly she let out a loud gasp of pain.
Nick and I stopped what we were doing and ran quickly towards her terror overcoming my body.
“M-Mommy are you okay?” My childlike voice asked as she let out another gasp.
“C-Call 911 sweetie my water broke. Oh!” she let another cry as I quickly ran inside the house forgetting about leaving Nick with her; I grabbed the phone on the wall quickly dialing.
“Hello how may we help you?” A young woman’s voice asked, tears formed in my eyes as I thought of the pain my mommy was in.
“M-My mom’s water broke.” I stuttered out praying she was going to be alright.
“Alright please just tell us your address and stay on the phone until we hang up okay?” After telling the address and she hung up I quickly called dad at the church he was working at. It rang three times before a gruff voice answered.
“Hello this is Kevin Jonas how may I help you?” I took a deep breath before informing my dad about mom.
“D-Daddy its Joe mommy‘s water broke,” Tears spilled down my face, “I’m scared daddy!”
“Did you call 911 son?” He asked.
“Y-Yes dad,” I looked out the window seeing the ambulance pull into the small drive way and the paramedics rushed to the front door. “Daddy they are here to get mom so I have to go.” Kevin quickly said goodbye and I ran to the door opening it for them and lead them to the backyard where mom was. They helped her onto the stretcher; I grabbed Nick’s hand getting into the ambulance with the paramedics.
“You forgot to call Kevin didn't you Joe?” Nick’s soft voice asked me, my eyes widening I forgot all about my older brother seeing as he was at his friend’s house playing video games.
Arriving at the hospital mom was rushed to the emergency room so they could deliver the baby; Nick and I sat in the waiting room silently waiting for Dad to arrive; we he finally arrived we waited hours and hours until our family was called to see our Mom. Walking into the small room I saw her holding a tiny little baby that looked like he was asleep.
“Joe, Nick this is your baby brother Franklin Nathaniel Jonas.” My mother said breathless as she cooed at the small one, my heart swelled as I gazed down at my little brother a huge grin on my face as the baby woke up and stuck his small hand towards me. I had never felt so happy or alive in one moment like I did then.
So we stand here now and no one knows us at all
I won't get used to this
I won't get used to being gone
And going back won't feel the same if we aren't staying
Going back to get away after everything has changed
I jumped at the sudden halt of the bus my expression changed from pure happiness to robot emotions again as the memory faded. I stood up brushing off my designer clothes the ones that would make me stick out in this small town, I looked at Kevin and Nick seeing that he was finally awake. All three of us stepped carefully off the bus and turned our heads as our driver said something that made me feel sick inside.
“Welcome home boys.” The door closed behind us I looked around the small neighborhood where we used to live in, it looked so different so normal not the extravagant houses that we were used to. I saw some familiar faces they would glance at us and look away as if they didn’t know who we were relief washed over me because they didn’t attack us for autographs but sadness came to because they don’t remember who we were.
We all walked a steady pace down the sidewalk not talking to each other; it was weird not talking to them we were so close but now it felt like I was walking with strangers. Kevin always the talkative one the one who would laugh loudly over the silliest jokes and always cared about his fans now had stopped with laughing all together and would rarely appreciate what the fans did for us.
Nick when he was younger he always smiled the kind of smile that would light up the whole room but sadly when we got to Hollywood he would read gossip about how people hated his smile they said it wasn’t perfect. So he got his teeth fixed but he still doesn’t smile still afraid people would make fun of him for it and I knew it hurt his fans when he wouldn’t smile in those pictures making them think they wouldn’t important enough for him to smile.
And me I became more serious not cracking as many jokes as I did when I was younger but I had to be serious I couldn’t be me anymore and sometimes I wish I could be.
“Guys do think we are staying here for a long time or just enough to get away from all the crazy fans and paparazzi?” I asked looking at my brothers faces studying their expressions.
“I don’t know Joe. I just feel so different and it scares me because I don’t feel like me anymore. I think we need this so much right now.” Kevin said looking at me and then to Nick whose head was hanging staring at his feet as he walked. “Nick are you okay?” He asked softly placing his hand on his shoulder as we came to a stop.
“I-It’s just not fair guys! I hate feeling like I can’t smile or be happy anymore. Heck I can’t even remember what being happy felt like!” He threw his head up tears streaming down his face. Kevin and I nodded in agreement with his words. “Guys I miss who we were before all this fame got to us before it took control. I miss it so much.” He crumbled to the ground as sobs overtook him Kevin and I bent down wrapping ours arms around our baby brother.
“We know Nick we know, we have to get through together.” At that moment I felt like we were becoming brothers again helping each other out when we needed someone the most. After we calmed Nick down we began walking again a few rain drops hitting us softly but we didn’t slow down we kept going knowing we had to get through this. The rain poured harder and our walking became faster as we sprinted down the sidewalk running away from what we become to something we were. The people we were before we became famous, before the fans before we lost ourselves.
We kept running even when our legs hurt so much and our lungs burned but we knew if we stopped we would go back to being the robots again so we kept running and as we did I never felt more alive.
When we did stop I looked at my brothers; Kevin laughing about nothing in particular something I had missed so much, Nick smiling that smile that light the room and me cracking a joke about how we all looked like drowned rats.
And maybe after this we would be better people and not change back because we would remember when we felt alive and that would bring us back no matter what and we had ourselves and our family through thick and thin.
Could you remind me of a time when we were so alive
Do you remember that? Do you remember that?
